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HomeMixedManners series: notes from Ramadan 2023

Manners series: notes from Ramadan 2023

This month the fajr reminders theme is Akhlaq and we will be exploring how this is understood in Islam, putting it into easy to understand language and clarifying morals, manners and ethics.

Why is it important? 

Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “I have been sent to perfect good character. Source: al-Muwaṭṭa’ 161

عَنْ مَالِك أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ بُعِثْتُ لِأُتَمِّمَ حُسْنَ الْأَخْلَاقِ

Abu Darda reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Nothing is heavier upon the scale of a believer on the Day of Resurrection than his good character. Verily, Allah hates the vulgar and obscene.” Source: Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2002

عَنْ أَبِي الدَّرْدَاءِ أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ مَا شَيْءٌ أَثْقَلُ فِي مِيزَانِ الْمُؤْمِنِ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ مِنْ خُلُقٍ حَسَنٍ وَإِنَّ اللَّهَ لَيُبْغِضُ الْفَاحِشَ الْبَذِيءَ

Aisha reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, the believer may reach by his good character the rank of one who regularly fasts and stands for prayer at night.” Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4798

عَنْ عَائِشَةَ أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ‏ إِنَّ الْمُؤْمِنَ لَيُدْرِكُ بِحُسْنِ خُلُقِهِ دَرَجَةَ الصَّائِمِ الْقَائِمِ

Who is our model?

KSI, Ronaldo, Khabib?

“Your akhlaq, ya Rasul Allah, is the highest of all.” [Surat Al-Qalam:68;4]

Nurtured by Allah SWT 

Khalq refers to the outer self – the body or a person’s size, shape, and features. Khuluq refers to the inner self – how one’s soul has been created, one’s mannerisms, and the way one interacts with others. Thus, each person has two elements that make them who they are: their outer self and their inner self.

Heart of good deeds and character

Belief & Intention – only when sincerely for Allah SWT 

How to develop this? With self awareness.

Thumamas story 

In the sixth year after the hijrah, the Prophet, may the blessings of God be on him, decided to expand the scope of his mission. He sent eight letters to rulers in the Arabian peninsula and surrounding areas inviting them to Islam. One of these rulers was Thumamah ibn Uthal.

Thumamah was one of the most powerful Arab rulers in pre-Quranic times. This is not surprising since he was a chieftain of the Banu Hanifah and one of the rulers of al-Yamamah whose word no one dared to challenge or disobey.

When Thumamah received the Prophet’s letter, he was consumed by anger and rejected it. He refused to listen to the invitation of Truth and goodness. More than that, he felt a strong desire to go and kill the Prophet and bury his mission with him.

Thumamah waited and waited for a convenient time to carry out his design against the Prophet until eventually forgetfulness caused him to lose interest. One of his uncles, however, reminded him of his plan, praising what he intended to do.

In the pursuit of his evil design against the Prophet, Thumamah met and killed a group of the Prophet’s companions. The Prophet thereupon declared him a wanted man who could lawfully be killed on sight. Not long afterwards, Thumamah decided to perform umrah. He wanted to perform tawaf around the Kabah and sacrifice to the idols there. So he left al-Yamamah for Makkah. As he was passing near Madinah, an incident took place which he had not anticipated.

Groups of Muslims were patrolling the districts of Madinah and outlying areas on the lookout for any strangers or anyone intent on causing trouble. One of these groups came upon Thumamah and apprehended him but they did not know who he was. They took him to Madinah and tied him to one of the columns in the mosque. They waited for the Prophet himself to question the man and decide what should be done with him.

When the Prophet was about to enter the mosque, he saw Thumamah and asked his companions, ‘Do you know whom you have taken?”

“No, messenger of God,” they replied.

“This is Thumamah ibn Uthal al-Hanafi,” he said. “You have done well in capturing him.”

The Prophet then returned home to his family and said, “Get what food you can and send it to Thumamah ibn Uthal.” He then ordered his camel to be milked for him. All this was done before he met Thumamah or had spoken to him.

The Prophet then approached Thumamah hoping to encourage him to become a Muslim. “What do you have to say for yourself?” he asked.

“If you want to kill in reprisal,” Thumamah replied, “you can have someone of noble blood to kill. If, out of your bounty, you want to forgive, I shall be grateful. If you want money in compensation, I shall give you whatever amount you ask.”

The Prophet then left him for two days, but still personally sent him food and drink and milk from his camel. The Prophet went back to him and asked, “What do you have to say for yourself?” Thumamah repeated what he had said the day before. The Prophet then left and came back to him the following day. “What do you have to say for yourself?” he asked again and Thumamah repeated what he had said once more. Then the Prophet turned to his companions and said, “Set him free.”

Thumamah left the mosque of the Prophet and rode until he came to a palm grove on the outskirts of Madinah near al-Baqi’ (a place of luxuriant vegetation which later became a cemetery for many of the Prophet’s companions). He watered his camel and washed himself well. Then he turned back and made his way to the Prophet’s mosque. There, he stood before a congregation of Muslims and said: “I bear witness that there is no god but Allah and I bear witness that Muhammad is His servant and His messenger.” He then went to the Prophet, upon whom be peace, and said: “O Muhammad, by God, there was never on this earth a face more detestable than yours. Now, yours is the dearest face of all to me.” “I have killed some of your men,” he continued, “I am at your mercy. What will you have done to me?”

“There is now no blame on you, Thumamah,” replied the Prophet. “Becoming a Muslim obliterates past actions and marks a new beginning.”

Thumamah was greatly relieved. His face showed his surprise and joy and he vowed, “By God, I shall place my whole self, my sword, and whoever is with me at your service and at the service of your religion.”

“O Rasulullah,” he went on, “when your horsemen captured me I was on my way to perform umrah. What do you think I should do now?”

“Go ahead and perform your umrah,” replied the Prophet, “but perform it according to the laws of God and His messenger.” The Prophet then taught him how to perform umrah according to Islamic rules.

Thumamah left to fulfill his intention. When he reached the valley of Makkah, he began shouting in a loud, resonant voice:

“Labbayk Allahumma labbayk. Labbayka Laa shareeka Laka labbayk. Innal hamda wan ni’mata Laka wall mulk. Laa shareeka Lak. (Here I am at Your command O Lord, Here I am. Here I am. No partner have You. Here I am. Praise, bounty and Dominion belong to You. No partner have You.”)

He was thus the first Muslim on the face of the earth to enter Makkah reciting the talbiyah.

The Quraysh heard the sound of the talbiyah and felt both anger and alarm. With drawn swords, they set out towards the voice to punish the one who had thus assaulted their preserve. As they came closer to him, Thumamah raised his voice even higher while reciting the talbiyah and looked upon them with pride and defiance. One of the Quraysh young men was particularly incensed and was about to shoot Thumamah with an arrow when the others grabbed his hand and shouted:

“Woe to you! Do you know who this is? He is Thumamah ibn Uthal, ruler of al-Yamamah. By God, if you should harm him, his people would cut our supplies, with dire consequences for us.”

Swords were replaced in their scabbards as the Quraysh went up to Thumamah and said:

“What’s wrong with you, Thumamah? Have you given in and abandoned your religion and the religion of your forefathers?”

“I have not given in,” he replied, “but I have decided to follow the best religion. I follow the religion of Muhammad. “

He then went on: “I swear to you by the Lord of this House that after my return to al-Yamamah, no grain of wheat or any of its produce shall reach you until you follow Muhammad.”

Under the watchful eyes of the Quraysh, Thumamah performed umrah as the Prophet, peace be upon him, had instructed him. He dedicated his sacrifice to God alone.

Thumamah returned to his land and ordered his people to withhold supplies from the Quraysh. The boycott gradually began to have effect and became more and more stringent. Prices began to rise. Hunger began to bite and there was even fear of death among the Quraysh. Thereupon, they wrote to the Prophet, saying:

“Our agreement with you (the treaty of Hudaybiyyah) is that you should maintain the bonds of kinship but you have gone against that. You have cut the bonds of kinship. You have killed and caused death through hunger. Thumamah ibn Uthal has cut our supplies and inflicted harm on us. Perhaps you would see fit to instruct him to resume sending us what we need.”

The Prophet immediately sent a messenger instructing Thumamah to lift the boycott and resume supplies to the Quraysh. This Thumamah did.

Take time for self awareness – muhaasabah

Where are you in your Akhlaq if measured by your wife/parents/siblings – where do you need to improve based on the Prophetic model?

Thumamah spent the rest of his life in the service of his religion, abiding by the undertaking he had given to the Prophet. When the Prophet died, many Arabs began leaving the religion of God in great numbers. Musaylamah, the impostor, began calling the Banu Hanifah to believe in him as a Prophet. Thumamah confronted him and said to his people:

“O Banu Hanifah, beware of this grievous matter. There is no light or guidance in it. By God, it will only bring distress and suffering to whoever joins this movement and misfortune even to those who do not join.

“O Banu Hanifah, two prophets do not come at the same time and there shall be no Prophet after Muhammad and no Prophet to share in his mission.”

He then read out to them the following verses of the Quran: “Ha Mim. The revelation of this Book is from God the Almighty, the Knowing. He forgives sins and accepts repentance. He is severe in punishment and has a long reach. There is no god except Him. To Him is the journey’s end.” (Surah Ghafir; verses 1-3).

“Can you compare these words of God with the uttering of Musaylamah?” he asked.

He then gathered together all those who had remained in Islam and began to wage a jihad against the apostates and to make the words of God supreme. The loyal Muslims of Banu Hanifah needed additional help to stand against the armies of Musaylamah. Their arduous task was completed by the forces dispatched by Abu Bakr but at the cost of many a Muslim life.


Our scholars have divided akhlāq into three categories, and the Prophet ṣallallāhu ‘alayhi wa sallam (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) came to perfect all three of them:

The first is akhlāq between a person and Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He). This includes aspects of faith and theology, such as believing in Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) alone and having tawakkul in Him.

The second is akhlāq with the rest of mankind. It covers our dealings with other people, such as being patient, just, and forgiving. It also includes having a clean heart.

The third is akhlāq with oneself in a person’s private life. Doing things well or completing tasks with perfection are examples of this category.

There has come to you a Messenger from among yourselves. Grievous to him is what you suffer; full of concern for you, to the believers kind and compassionate. (Taubah 9:128)

لَقَدْ جَآءَكُمْ رَسُولٌۭ مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ عَزِيزٌ عَلَيْهِ مَا عَنِتُّمْ حَرِيصٌ عَلَيْكُم بِٱلْمُؤْمِنِينَ رَءُوفٌۭ رَّحِيمٌۭ 

The Prophet’s(SAW) heart overflowed with concern and compassion for humanity – worried that they would be hurt in this life and the Next.

I heard Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) saying, “My example and the example of the people is that of a man who made a fire, and when it lighted what was around it, Moths and other insects started falling into the fire. The man tried (his best) to prevent them, (from falling in the fire) but they overpowered him and rushed into the fire. The Prophet (ﷺ) added: Now, similarly, I take hold of the knots at your waist (belts) to prevent you from falling into the Fire, but you insist on falling into it.” (Bukhari: 6483)

Aisha reported: When I saw the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, with a cheerful face, I said, “O Messenger of Allah, supplicate to Allah for me.” The Prophet said, “O Allah, forgive Aisha for her past and future sins, in secret and in public.” Aisha laughed so much that her head fell from his lap. The Prophet said to her, “Does my supplication make you happy?” Aisha said, “Why would your supplication not make me happy?” The Prophet said, “By Allah, it is my supplication for my nation in every prayer.” Ṣaḥīḥ Ibn Ḥibbān 3446

عَائِشَةَ أَنَّهَا قَالَتْ لَمَّا رَأَيْتُ مِنَ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ طِيبَ نَفْسٍ قُلْتُ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ادْعُ اللَّهَ لِي فَقَالَ اللَّهُمَّ اغْفِرْ لِعَائِشَةَ مَا تَقَدَّمَ مِنْ ذَنَبِهَا وَمَا تَأَخَّرَ مَا أَسَرَّتْ وَمَا أَعْلَنَتْ فَضَحِكَتْ عَائِشَةُ حَتَّى سَقَطَ رَأْسُهَا فِي حِجْرِه مِنَ الضَّحِكِ قَالَ لَهَا رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ أَيَسُرُّكِ دُعَائِي فَقَالَتْ وَمَا لِي لا يَسُرُّنِي دُعَاؤُكَ فَقَالَ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ وَاللَّهِ إِنَّهَا لَدُعَائِي لأُمَّتِي فِي كُلِّ صَلاةٍ

Thereafter he recited the verse in which Nabi ‘Isa (‘alayhis Salam) said: ‘If you punish them, then they are surely your bondsmen. And if You forgive them then You are indeed most Forgiving, most Merciful.

Then Rasulullah (SAW) raised his hands, cried and said:‘O Allah! my Ummat, my Ummat!’

When Jibril (‘alayhis salam) came, he was informed of the reason.

Allah Ta’ala said to Jibril (‘alayhis salam): ‘O Jibril! Go back to Muhammad (sallallahu’alayhi wasallam) and tell him we shall please you, and not displease you regarding your Ummah.’ (Muslim, 498)

The Adaptable:

– Persistence of Nuh(AS), Patience of Yaqub (AS), Wisdom of Yusuf (AS), literary Range of Sulaiman (AS), Resilience of Ayyub (AS), Strength of Musa(AS) and the purity & honour of Isa(AS)

CONSIDERING YOUR AUDIENCE `A’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said:

“If the first verse to be revealed was, ‘Do not drink alcohol’, the Arabs would have replied: ‘we will never leave drinking alcohol’. If the first verse to be revealed was, ‘don’t fornicate,’ they would have replied: ‘we will never leave fornication…’” (Al-Bukhari)

DIFFERENTIATION Abdullah ibn Amr reported: A man came to the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, asking permission to wage jihad. The Prophet said, “Are your parents alive?” The man said yes. The Prophet said, “Then strive in the service of them both.” Fafeehima faJaahid (Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 3004, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2549)

EVERY OPPORTUNITY: One day, the Prophet’s Jewish neighbour became ill, so the Prophet (peace be upon him) visited him. Anas reported this incident, saying, «A Jewish youth used to serve the Prophet (peace be upon him). The youth became ill, so the Prophet went to visit him. The Prophet (peace be upon him) sat at his head and said, ‘Enter Islam.’ The youth looked at his father who was near him. His father said, ‘Obey Abu Qasim.’ Consequently, the youth entered Islam. When the Prophet (peace be upon him) left, he said, ‘Praise be to Allah Who saved him from the hell-fire’» [ Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 1290].

EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT Anas ibn Malik reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Make things easy and do not make things difficult. Give glad tidings and do not frighten them away.”

In another narration, the Prophet said, “Make people calm and do not frighten them away.”

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 69, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 1734

عَنْ أَنَسِ بْنِ مَالِكٍ عَنْ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ يَسِّرُوا وَلَا تُعَسِّرُوا وَبَشِّرُوا وَلَا تُنَفِّرُوا

وفي رواية أخرى قال وسكِّنوا ولا تُنفِّروا

CREATIVE APPROACHES: Shaykh ‘Abd al-Fattah Abu Ghuddah, the late renowned Hanafi Scholar of Syria captured in his text Ar-Rasul al-Mu’allim wa Asalibuhu fi ‘l-Ta’lim – the teaching techniques of the Prophet(SAW) so many styles:

  • Use questions e.g. what would be the situation of someone who bathes in the river by his door 5 times a day, would he be dirty? Who is the bankrupt? 
  • Use analogies e.g. Should I do Hajj on behalf of my mother who passed? If she had debts, would you pay them off? Allah(SWT) is more worthy of being fulfilled. Morsel of charity multiplied to the size of Uhud.
  • Use diagrams: Straight line in the sand, with 2 lines on left and right to indicate the sabeel of Allah(SWT) – the other paths will distract and divide you
  • Use gestures: I and the orphan will be like this (2 fingers), beware of this (grabbing his tongue)
  • Repetition: Anas said “Whenever the Prophet spoke a sentence (said a thing), he used to repeat it thrice so that the people could understand it properly (Volume 1, Book 3, Number 95). Hadith of Ramadan and saying Aameen thrice for entering Ramadan and not being forgiven, parents become elderly not forgiven and not sending salaam on Prophet(SAW)

MEET THEM WHERE THEY ARE “Rukanah b. Yazid was an unbeaten wrestling champ. On the authority of Ibn `Abbas (رضي الله عنه) who reported that- Yazeed ibn Rukanah wrestled the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) and the Prophet (ﷺ) threw him three times, and each time for a wager of hundred sheep.

The third time Rukanah said: ‘O Muhammad! No one has ever put my back on the ground before you, and no one was more hateful in my sight before this than you. And (now) I testify that there is no one worthy of being worshipped except Allah and that you are His Messenger.’ At this, the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) stood up and returned him his sheep. He (SAW) was 50 at this point (Sunan Abi Dawud, 4078, and Sunan At-Tirmidhi, 1748)


وَمَآ أَرْسَلْنَـٰكَ إِلَّا رَحْمَةًۭ لِّلْعَـٰلَمِينَ ١٠٧

We have sent you ˹O Prophet˺ only as a mercy for the whole world. (Surah al Anbiya 21:107)

Sayyidna Ibn ` Umar , has reported that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said اَنَا رَحمَۃُ مُھدَاۃُ بِرَفعِ قَومِ وَخفضِ آخرِینَ that is “I am the blessing sent by Allah so that I lift up the people (who obey Allah) and humble the other people (who disobey Allah). (Ibn Kathir)


“Good character is more to be praised than outstanding talent. Most talents are to some extent a gift. Good character, by contrast, is not given to us. We have to build it piece by piece by thought, choice, courage and determination.”

Aisha reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, gentleness is not found in anything but that it beautifies it, and it is not removed from anything but that it disgraces it.”

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2594

عَنْ عَائِشَةَ عَنْ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ إِنَّ الرِّفْقَ لَا يَكُونُ فِي شَيْءٍ إِلَّا زَانَهُ وَلَا يُنْزَعُ مِنْ شَيْءٍ إِلَّا شَانَ

Aisha reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Allah is gentle and He loves gentleness in all matters.”

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6927, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2165

عَنْ عَائِشَةَ قَالَتْ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ رَفِيقٌ يُحِبُّ الرِّفْقَ فِي الْأَمْرِ كُلِّهِ

The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Whoever is deprived of the characteristic of gentleness is deprived of all goodness.”

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2592

We feel unprotected and at risk. Gentleness is hard because, when we are gentle, we feel exposed.

When we are gentle, we feel we have given away our power. We fear we will be taken advantage of. No one will look after us and we will be unable to take care of ourselves.

Gentleness is not in control. It feels helpless and incompetent. There is not much about gentleness that is attractive to the world at large. Everything we have been taught about life encourages us to resist gentleness.

We want power and strength. We want to approach life from a position of invincibility. We want to have an impact on the world, to control the circumstances of our lives and make things turn out the way we have determined they should. We want to be able to “get a handle on things,” to “wrestle life to the ground.”

Aisha (may Allah be pleased with him) said,

“The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) did not hit anyone at all, not a woman or servant, except when he was fighting in Allah’s cause. Moreover, he never took revenge for any bad anyone did to him, unless the person did something prohibited by Allah, for which he would take revenge for Allah”

related by Muslim

Mu’awiyah ibn Al-Hakam related,

“When I was praying with the Prophet (peace be upon him), one of the men sneezed,

so I said, ‘May Allah have mercy on you.’ As a result, the others looked at me and said, ‘What a great loss!’

–a phrase which is said at times of distress, eg. when a mother loses a child–

I asked, ‘Why are you looking at me?’ This made them slap their thighs. When I understood they wanted me to be silent, I stopped talking. After the Prophet (peace be upon him) had prayed, may my mother and father by sacrificed for him, I had not seen a better teacher before or after that time. By Allah, he did not punish me,

hit me, or swear at me.” The Prophet (peace be upon him) just said,

Talking to others is not appropriate during prayers, for prayer is for glorifying Allah (saying Tasbih), exalting His Greatness (saying Allahu Akbar) and reciting the Quran related by Muslim.

even with the foolish of those who followed a different religion to him. And how can he be otherwise when he is the one who called to the way of his Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching.

And said,

‘Death be on you,’ that is poison and death on you. Aisha understood what they had said, so she replied, ‘And may death and a curse be on you.’

Consequently, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘Wait, Aisha. Allah loves gentleness in all matters.’

She replied,

‘Oh Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) did you not hear what they said?!’

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘But I said, “[let it be] on you”’

related by Al-Bukhari and Muslim

A young man came to the Prophet (peace be upon him) and said,

‘Oh Messenger of Allah, give me permission to fornicate.’ The people surrounded him and rebuked him.

They said,

‘Be quiet, be quiet!’


The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘Come here [and sit down].’ So he came close to him and sat down.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘Do you like that for your mother?’

The young man said,

‘No, by Allah. May I be sacrificed for you!’

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘And people do not like it for their mothers. Do you like it for your daughters?’

The young man replied,

‘No, by Allah. May I be sacrificed for you.’

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘And the people do not like it for their daughters. Do you like it for your sister?’

The man replied,

‘No, by Allah. May I be sacrificed for you.’

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘And the people do not like it for their sisters. Do you like it for your aunt [on your father’s side]?’

The young man replied,

‘No, by Allah. May I be sacrificed for you.’

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘And the people do not like it for the aunts [on their father’s side]. Do you like it for your aunt [on your mother’s side]?’

He replied,

‘No, by Allah. May I be sacrificed for you.’

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

‘And the people do not like it for their aunts [on their mother’s side].’ Then he (peace be upon him) placed his hand on him

and said,

‘Oh Allah, forgive his sin, purify his heart and guard his chastity.’ After that, the young man never again turned to anything sinful

related by Ahmed


Integrity is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. When you have integrity, you do the right thing even when no one is watching.

A great example of integrity is giving credit to someone whose work you could have taken credit for. I have witnessed people in higher positions take credit for a successful project or achievement they played little part in. However, a leader with integrity would gladly acknowledge the people who did the work and give them the credit they deserve.


Urwah reported: Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “No one had better character than the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him. No one from his companions or his family called upon him but that he would say: I am at your service. (Labbaik) For this reason, Allah Almighty revealed the verse: Verily, you are upon great moral character.” (68:4): Dalā’il al-Nubuwwah 119

Being humble will let you achieve greatness. It includes being modest and not thinking you are better than others. When you are humble, you accept both praise and criticism.

The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Whoever humbles himself by a degree for Allah, glory be to Him, Allah will raise him by a degree. Whoever is arrogant to Allah by a degree, Allah will lower him by a degree until he is made ‘the lowest of the low.’” (95:5) : Sunan Ibn Mājah 4176

مَنْ يَتَوَاضَعُ لِلَّهِ سُبْحَانَهُ دَرَجَةً يَرْفَعُهُ اللَّهُ بِهِ دَرَجَةً وَمَنْ يَتَكَبَّرُ عَلَى اللَّهِ دَرَجَةً يَضَعُهُ اللَّهُ بِهِ دَرَجَةً حَتَّى يَجْعَلَهُ فِي أَسْفَلِ السَّافِلِينَ

Allah Almighty says that might is His garment and grandeur is His cloak: Whoever competes with Me, I will punish him.”: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2620

يَقُولُ اللَّهُ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ الْعِزُّ إِزَارُهُ وَالْكِبْرِيَاءُ رِدَاؤُهُ فَمَنْ يُنَازِعُنِي عَذَّبْتُهُ

The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Blessed is he who has humility without debasing himself, who lowers himself without humiliating himself, who spends wealth in charity and accumulates it without sinning, who is merciful to the lowly and downtrodden, and who accompanies the people of understanding and wisdom.”: Shu’ab al-Imān 3116

The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) used to meet and call on the weak Muslims. He (peace be upon him) used to also visit those of them who were ill and attend their funerals (Al-Hakim)

Whenever he passed by a group of boys he would greet them. Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) said that “he (Anas) passed by a group of boys and greeted them.”

And he added, “The Prophet (peace be upon him) used to do this” (Al-Bukhari)

Once – on the day of the conquest of Makkah – a man stood-up (out of reverence) for the Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, who, being shocked, said to him: “Do not trouble yourself! Indeed I am not a king. Rather I am merely the son of a Qurayshi woman who eats dry meat.”

The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, “Whoever likes the people to stand up for him should take his seat in the hell-fire” related by Ahmed.

Al-Hasan said, “Do you know what is humility? Humility is that you leave your house and you do not meet any Muslim but that you view him as better than yourself.”: al-Tawāḍu’ wal-Khumūl 116

Anas reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, had a camel named Al-‘Adba and she could not be outraced. A bedouin came riding his camel and outraced her. That was difficult for the Muslims and they said, “Al-‘Adba has been beaten!” The Prophet said, “Verily, it is a duty upon Allah that nothing is raised up in this world but that it will eventually be humbled.”: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6136

Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “He is not arrogant who eats with his servants, rides a donkey in the market, tends to his sheep and milks them.”: al-Adab al-Mufrad 547

Mu’adh ibn Jabal (may Allah be pleased with him) said, “I used to ride with the Prophet (peace be upon him), sitting behind him On a donkey which was called Ofayr” related by Al-Bukhari and Muslim.

Abdullah ibn Umm Maktum came up and asked him to read a verse from the Quran. “O messenger of God,” he said, “teach me from what God has taught you.”

“He frowned and turned away when the blind man approached him ! Yet for all you knew, (O Muhammad), he might perhaps have grown in purity or have been reminded of the Truth, and helped by this reminder. Now as for him who believes himself to be self-sufficient, to him you gave your whole attention, although you are not accountable for his failure to attain to purity. But as for him who came unto you full of eagerness and in awe of God, him did you disregard.

Nay, verily, this is but a reminder and so, whoever is willing may remember Him in the light of His revelations blest with dignity, lofty and pure, borne by the hands of messengers, noble and most virtuous.’ (Surah Abasa 8O: 116).

These are the sixteen verses which were revealed to the noble Prophet about Abdullah ibn Umm Maktum, sixteen verses that have continued to be recited from that time till today and shall continue to be recited.

From that day the Prophet did not cease to be generous to Abdullah ibn Umm Maktum. to ask him about his affairs, to fulfill his needs and take him into his council whenever he approached. This is not strange. Was he not censured by God in a most severe manner on Abdullah’s account? In fact, in later years, he often greeted Ibn Umm Maktum with these words of humility:

“Welcome unto him on whose account my Sustainer has rebuked me.” 

One of the responsibilities that the Prophet placed on Abdullah ibn Umm Maktum was to put him in charge of Madinah in his absence. This was done more than ten times, one of them being when he left for the liberation of Makkah.

Humility is the surest sign of strength. Humility isn’t denying your strengths; it’s being honest about your weaknesses.


Compassion is the ability to care for others and feel empathy for their situation. It includes being kind and understanding. When you are compassionate, you want to help others who are suffering.



Sunan Ibn Majah 4100

It was narrated from Abu Dharr Al-Ghifari that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:

“Zuhd – Indifference towards this world – does not mean forbidding what is permitted, or squandering wealth, rather indifference towards this world means not thinking that what you have in your hand is more reliable than what is in Allah’s Hand, and it means feeling that the reward for a calamity that befalls you is greater than that which the calamity makes you miss out on.’”

Sunan Ibn Majah 4102 (Daeef)

It was narrated that Sahl bin Sa’d As-Sa’idi said:

“A man came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, show me a deed which, if I do it, Allah will love me and people will love me. The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: 

ازْهَدْ فِي الدُّنْيَا يُحِبَّكَ اللَّهُ وَازْهَدْ فِيمَا فِي أَيْدِي النَّاسِ يُحِبُّوكَ ‏”‏ ‏

“Be indifferent towards this world, and Allah will love you. Be indifferent to what is in people’s hands, and they will love you.” 

This does not mean not having wealth as Abu Bakr (RA) and Uthman were from the wealthiest.

Jibril was sitting with the Prophet sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam looking towards the sky, when he saw an angel. So Jibril – ‘alayhis-salam – said to him: Indeed, this angel has never descended before today. So when the angel had descended, he said: O Muhammad! I have been sent by your Lord (to inquire) whether He should make you a Prophet-King or a Slave-Messenger. 

Gabriel said, “Be humble before your Lord, O Muhammad.” The Prophet said, “Rather, I will be a servant-messenger.” Bal, abdan Rasoolan

 [Related by Ahmad (2/321)

اللَّهُمَّ أَحْيِنِي مِسْكِينًا وَأَمِتْنِي مِسْكِينًا وَاحْشُرْنِي فِي زُمْرَةِ الْمَسَاكِينِ

O Allah, cause me to live poor and cause me to die poor, and gather me among the poor (on the Day of Resurrection).’” 

Aisha asked why he said this and he replied “Because they will enter Paradise 40 years before the rich. Aisha, Don’t turn away a poor person, even if all you can give is half a date. If you love the poor and bring them near to you, Allah will you bring you near to Him on the Day of Resurrection (Tirmidhi) 2352)

Malik ibn Dinar reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, never ate to his fill of bread or meat unless he was eating with people. ( al-Shamā’il al-Muḥammadīyah 71)

Aisha reported: She said to ‘Urwah, “O my nephew, we used to sight three crescent moons in two months without having any fire to cook in the house of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him.” ‘Urwah said, “How did you live?” Aisha said, “With the two dark things, dates and water, except that the Messenger of Allah had neighbors among the Ansar who had some milking animals. They would give the Messenger of Allah some milk from their animals and he would give it to us to drink.”: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6459, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2972

The Prophet SAW accepted and attended invitations where bread made of barley and stale fat was served. The armour he possessed had been pawned to a Jew, and he (SAW) passed away without possessing sufficient amount to release it (Shamail)

If the world were as worthy to Allah as the wing of a mosquito, an unbeliever would not even be given a sip of water.”


عَنْ سَهْلِ بْنِ سَعْدٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ لَوْ كَانَتْ الدُّنْيَا تَعْدِلُ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ جَنَاحَ بَعُوضَةٍ مَا سَقَى كَافِرًا مِنْهَا شَرْبَةَ مَاءٍ

Umar ibn al-Khattab reported: I entered the room of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, while he was lying on his side over a mat. I sat down as he drew up his lower garment and he was not wearing anything else. The mat had left marks on his side. I looked at the Prophet’s cupboard and I saw a handful of barley in a small amount, the same of mimosa leaves in the corner, and a leather bag hanging to the side. My eyes started to tear up, and the Prophet said, “What makes you weep, son of Khattab?” I said, “O Prophet of Allah, why should I not cry that this mat has left marks on your side and I see little in this cupboard? Caesar and Khosrau live among fruits and springs, while you are the Messenger of Allah and His chosen, yet this is your cupboard.” The Prophet said, “O son of Khattab, are you not pleased that they are for us in the Hereafter and for them in the world?” I said, “Of course.” Muslim 1479

يَا ابْنَ الْخَطَّابِ أَلاَ تَرْضَى أَنْ تَكُونَ لَنَا الآخِرَةُ وَلَهُمُ الدُّنْيَا قُلْتُ بَلَى


Anas Bin Maalik said: While we were in the masjid with the Messenger of Allaah, a Bedouin came; he then urinated in the masjid.

The Companions of the Messenger of Allaah said, “Mah Mah (An expression used to severly scold someone, to indicate the graveness of a matter).” Stop it! Stop it!

But the Messenger of Allaah said, “Do not interrupt him, but instead leave him.”

They left him alone until he finished urinating.

The Messenger of Allaah called him over and said to him, “Any kind of urine or filth is not suitable for these masjids. Instead they are only [appropriate] for the remembrance of Allaah, the Prayer, and the recitation of the Qur’aan,” or this is near to what the Messenger of Allaah said.

He (saw) then issued an order to a man from the people, who then came with a bucket of water, which he poured over the [effected] area [of the masjid]. [Related by Muslim in his Saheeh, 285]

After he understood [the wrong which he had done], the Bedouin said, “The Prophet (saw) stood before me – may my mother and father be ransom for him – and he (saw) neither cursed nor scolded nor hit [me]”

[Related by Ahmad 2/503. Ahmad Shaakir (10540) said, “Its chain is authentic.”]

He was so affected by this lenient approach and gentle tarbiyyah he began to supplicate

Allahummarhamni wa Muhammadan wa law tarham ma’Anaa ahadan 

“O Allaah, have mercy on me and on Muhammad, and do not have mercy on anyone other than us.”

The Prophet smiled and said, “You have indeed constricted that which is vast.” Allah SWT says “My Mercy embraces all things”

Khalid bin Al Walied was from the “Al-Makhzoum” tribe and grew up as close friends with Abu Jahl and his son Ikrimah, both skilled in horse riding and archery. As the son of the influential al Walid bin al Mughirah they were both staunch enemies of islam.

He Was commander of a cavalry in Uhud and also in Khnadaq and at his hand many muslims were martyred. At the time of Umrah al Qada his brother who had accepted islam, Walid bin Al Walid wrote to him and 

Khalid ibn Al-Waleed, a division commander of the Quraysh’s army at the Battle of Uhud, managed to attack the Muslims from behind and turn their victory into a military defeat. He was a young man of great promise. Indeed, he was to become one of the most distinguished commanders the world had ever known. However, it took him a long time before beginning to think of adopting Islam. He says that the process began when he started to reflect on his past attitude during events of great importance.

“I fought all those battles against Muhammad (pbuh). Every time I felt that all my efforts were to no avail. I was certain that Muhammad would eventually be the winner. When the Prophet came and encamped at Al-Hudaybiyah, I commanded a detachment of horsemen from among the idolaters until we met the Prophet and his companions at Asafan. I drew close to him to provoke him. He and his companions prayed Zuhr in front of us. We thought of attacking them, but we refrained. He must have realized what we were thinking of when the next prayer, Asr, was due. He therefore, led his companions in what is known as “the prayers of fear”. That affected us profoundly and we realized that he was immune from our attack. We therefore drew back.

When the terms of the peace agreement of Al-Hudaybiyah were eventually negotiated and the Prophet and his companions went home, I started thinking about what might come next and what was in store for us. I thought hard: Where should I go? Should I join Negus? But then I remembered that he had already become a follower of Muhammad and that Muhammad’s companions were safe under his protection. Should I go and join Heraclius? That would have made me a Christian or a Jewish convert. That prospect did not appeal to me. Should I emigrate or should I stay where I was, waiting for something to happen?”

This state of confusion was not to be easily resolved for Khalid. He did not wish to emigrate where he would have had to prove his worth. If he stayed in Makkah, on the other hand, he knew for certain that the eventual triumph of Islam was only a matter of time. His confusion, however, clouded his vision and he could not see that the right course of action was to look at Islam objectively. Weeks and months passed and he could not make up his mind. When a year was over, and Prophet Muhammad and his companions came to Makkah for their compensatory Umrah, Khalid did not wish to look at the Muslims coming into Makkah. He went into the mountains and stayed until the Prophet and his companions departed.

When he went back home, he found a letter left him by his brother, Al-Waleed ibn Al-Waleed, who had been a Muslim for some time. The letter read as follows:

“In the name of God, the Merciful, the Beneficent.

I am infinitely amazed at the fact that you continue to turn away from Islam when you are as intelligent as I know you to be. No one can be so blind to the truth of Islam. God’s Messenger asked me about you, and said: ‘Where is Khalid?’ I said to him: ‘God will bring him to us.’ He said: ‘A man of his caliber cannot remain ignorant of Islam. If he would use his intelligence and his experience for the Muslims against the idolaters, he would benefit from it a great deal. We would certainly give him precedence over others.’ It is high time, brother, for you to make amends for the great benefits you have missed.”

When Khalid read his brother’s letter, he felt as if a curtain which had blurred his vision for a long time was removed. He was pleased at the fact that the Prophet himself inquired about him. He felt a strong desire to become a Muslim. That night he dreamt that he was in a narrow strip of land in a barren desert and he was walking on and on until he came into an open, green, limitless field. It did not take him long to make up his mind that the right course for him was to become a Muslim. He decided to join the Prophet at Madinah.

He felt, however, that he needed to have a companion to go with him. He looked for a young man from the nobility of Makkah and the first one he approached was Safwan ibn Umayyah. Safwan’s father and brother were killed at the Battle of Badr. His uncle was killed at Uhud. Safwan belonged to that generation of Quraysh leaders who viewed their conflict with Islam in clear-cut terms. He had resolved not to compromise with Prophet Muhammad and he was in no mood to do so when Khalid approached him. Nevertheless, Khalid said to him: “Do you not see that Muhammad is gaining the upper hand against both the Arabs and the non-Arabs? It is certainly expedient for us to join him and share in whatever success he may achieve.” Safwan took a very extreme attitude and said to Khalid: “If all the Arabs followed Muhammad and I was the only one left, I would still not join him.”

When Khalid heard this reply he thought that Safwan was a man who nursed his grudges and he remembered that his father and brother were killed at Badr. He, therefore, tried to look for someone else. By chance, he met Ikrimah ibn Abu Jahl, whose father had always been the most determined enemy of Islam, until he was killed at Badr. Ikrimah’s reply to Khalid’s approach was in terms similar to those of Safwan. Khalid, however, asked him not to mention his approach to anyone and lkrimah promised him that.

Khalid then met Uthman ibn Talhah, a close friend of his. He thought of probing the matter with him, then he remembered that Uthman’s father, uncle and his four brothers were all killed at the Battle of Uhud. Khalid hesitated, expecting a reply similar to those of Safwan and Ikrimah. Eventually, he probed Uthman, speaking first about the fact that the Muslims continued to gain strength. He then said: “I compare our position to that of a fox in a hole. If you pour a bucket of water down into the hole, you can be certain that the fox will come out.” Then Khalid proposed to Uthman that they join the Prophet in Madinah. Uthman responded positively. The two agreed to start their journey after midnight, and each to travel on his own and meet at the break of day at Ya’jaj. They then continued their journey together until they arrived at Al-Haddah, where they met Amr ibn Al-Aas. He said to them: “Welcome. Where are you heading?” Realizing that they all had the same purpose, the three of them moved together until they arrived on the outskirts of Madinah, where they stopped to change their clothes. Khalid’s report is as follows:

“God’s Messenger (peace be upon him) was informed of our arrival, and he was pleased. I put on one of my best suits and went ahead to meet the Prophet. On the way I was met by my brother, who said to me: ‘Be quick. God’s Messenger has been informed of your arrival and he is pleased. He is waiting for you.’ We then moved faster until we saw him at a distance, smiling. He wore his smile until I reached him and greeted him as God’s Prophet and Messenger. He replied to my greeting with a face beaming with pleasure. I said: ‘I declare that there is no deity but God, and that you are God’s Messenger.’ He said: ‘Come forward.’ When I drew nearer, he said to me: ‘I praise God for guiding you to Islam. I have always been aware that you are endowed with great intelligence and I have always hoped that your intelligence will lead you only to what is right and beneficial.’ I said to him: ‘Messenger of God, I am thinking of those battles at which I was fighting against the side of the truth. I request you to pray God for me to forgive me.’ He said: ‘When you embrace Islam, all your past sins are forgiven.’ I said: ‘Messenger of God, is that a condition?’ He said: ‘My Lord, forgive Khalid ibn Al-Waleed every effort he exerted to turn people away from Your path.’ Uthman and Amr then pledged their allegiance to the Prophet. By God, ever since our arrival in the month of Safar in the 8th year of the Prophet’s emigration, the Prophet consulted me about every serious matter which cropped up, ahead of all his other companions.”

Khalid RA was very tall, handsome, broad-shouldered, and well-built. When he converted to Islam, he was 43 and died at the age of 59. So, all of his brilliance was during these 15 years only.

Then not too much time passed before the Bedouin urinated in the masjid. The sahaabah rushed towards him, and the Prophet (saw) said, “Pour a bucketful of water on it (i.e., on the effected area).” He (saw) then said, “Verily, you were sent only to make maters easy, and you were not sent to make matters difficult.”

[Related by Tirmidhi, 147, Ahmad 2/239. Tirmidhi said, “This hadith is Hasan Saheeh”. Ahmad Shaakir (7254) said, “Its chain is authentic.”]


Repel evil with that which is good You will notice, the one who harboured enmity against you, will turn into your fast friend Surah Fussilat 41: verse 34)

In Islamic context, repelling evil means tolerance and generosity towards evil behaviour. It means overlooking and pardoning the misdeeds committed against you and reciprocating it with better conduct.

Forebearance : patient self-control; restraint and tolerance.

Zaid bin Sana, a very notable companion of the Prophet ﷺ was a Jewish scholar of Torah till he embraced Islam. As an avid reader of Torah, he carefully analysed the claim of the prophethood by Prophet ﷺ and signs of prophethood with the help of Torah. He got all of them confirmed except a few, which prevented him from embracing Islam.

Imam Tirmidhi narrates a Hadith about the incident on how he confirmed two important characteristics of the prophethood. Once he came to Prophet ﷺ and spoke about a tribe which was at a distance from Madinah and was running short of food. They had just recently accepted Islam. Zaid ibn Sana offered dates from his farm and offered to give them (Muslims) some time to make the payment. It was agreed by both parties and so the dates were delivered.


 Zaid came to the Prophet ﷺ a few days before the final date of payment. He demanded his money in a very rude manner while the companions stood there stunned:

“I want my money just now’ he insisted and added, ” Delaying other’s payments seems to be a habit that runs in your family”.

He used all rude words to provoke the Messenger of Allah ﷺ

As always, Umar ibn Khattab (May Allah be pleased with him) could not tolerate his insulting behavior, so he came forward and pushed Zaid away. Zaid fell down and Umar (May Allah be pleased with him) started hitting him.

While Umar responded with harshness and beating, Zaid was watching the response of the Prophet ﷺ who rushed forward and stopped Umar (May Allah be pleased with him) and scolded him: “Umar I owe money to him and he has a right to demand.”

Then he asked Umar to go to so and so person and to request him to give his dates to Zaid on his behalf. Umar was instructed not to taunt him on the way. He obeyed and they went to the farm where he got the dates and paid them to Zaid.


An extra sack of dates was added as well. A surprised Zaid asked him the reason and Umar said that it was the instruction of the Prophet ﷺ as a compensation for hitting him.

These were the two great Prophetic attributes among the ones mentioned in the Torah which Zaid wanted to confirm. That was the moment, Zaid stood up and recited the Shahada- the testimony of Islamic faith. Zaid donated all of his goods. Umar (May Allah be pleased with him) was stunned and they both went to the Prophet ﷺ where Zaid explained his reasons for appearing to be rude towards the Prophet ﷺ  

“All the signs of Prophethood mentioned in Torah had been confirmed but only ‘Hilm’- tolerance overcomes his anger, and that intense abuse only increases him in forbearance. So I decided to check it out and now I am convinced that indeed you are the Prophet whose arrival is mentioned in our books.”

Zaid (May Allah be pleased with him) offered to go anywhere to do Jihad and he donated all his property in the Islamic treasury to be utilised for a good purpose.

On one occasion, the Prophet ﷺ silently smiled when Abu Bakr (ra), his most noble Companion, refrained from responding to a person who was insulting him. But when Abu Bakr (ra) eventually spoke up, the Prophet ﷺ  became angry and left. He ﷺ later explained, “An angel was with you,  responding on your behalf. But when you said back to him some of what he  said, a devil arrived, and it is not for me to sit with devils.” The  Prophet ﷺ taught thereby that when a person stoops to the level of those who insult them they allow the devil to steer their course. One of the core principles of Islamic spirituality is not to allow our emotions and actions to be hijacked by the devil to the point where our decision-making is driven by other than divine instruction.

We hope that by treating others with hilm, Allah will be merciful to us. 

One of His beautiful names is Al-Halīm. Al Ghazali explained that Al-Halīm is “the One who observes the disobedience of the rebellious, and notices the opposition to the command, yet anger does not incite Him, nor wrath seize Him, nor do haste and recklessness move Him to rush to take vengeance, although He is utterly capable of doing that.”

“If God were to punish people [at once] for the wrong they have done, there would not be a single creature left on the surface of the earth. He gives them respite for a stated time and, whenever their time comes, God has been watching His servants (35:45).”

  • Zayd ibn harithah – al Habeeb – inseparable from the Prioher saw for his good conduct
  • Aslam (RA) slave who became shaheed without a single sajdah and was forgiven. Optimism of Prophet (SAW)

In one hadith Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated:

I went along with Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) at a time during the day but he did not talk to me and I did not talk to him until he reached the market of Banu Qainuqa`.

He came back to the tent of Fatimah and said,“Is the little chap (meaning Al-Hasan) there?”

We were under the impression that his mother had detained him in order to bathe and dress him and garland him with sweet garland.

Not much time had passed that he (Al-Hasan) came running until both of them embraced each other, thereupon Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “O Allah, I love him; love him and love one who loves him.” (Muslim)

Hasan and Hussain were 7 and 6 when SAW passed.

Not just his own children Usamah ibn Zaid (may Allah be pleased with him) shows this humane aspect of the Prophet’s personality:

Allah’s Messenger used to put me on (one of) his thighs and put Al-Hasan ibn `Ali on his other thigh, and then embrace us and say, “O Allah! Please be merciful to them, as I am merciful to them.” (Al-Bukhari)

When he entered Mecca after the conquest his grandson Ali, the son of Zainab, was on the saddle. His granddaughter Umame, the child of his daughter Zainab, was one of these. Prophet Muhammad would take her on his shoulder while praying, when bending over (ruku) in the prayer he would put her on the floor and when he stood up again would take her on his shoulders once again.

The Prophet said, “(It happens that) I start the prayer intending to prolong it, but on hearing the cries of a child, I shorten the prayer because I know that the cries of the child will incite its mother’s passions.” (Al-Bukhari)

“Fear Allah and treat your children [small or grown] fairly (with equal justice).” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

Narrated `A’ishah: The Prophet took a child in his lap … and then the child urinated on him, so he asked for water and poured it over the place of the urine. (Al-Bukhari)

One day Prophet Muhammad went to Fatima’s house. Ali was sleeping and Hussein asked for something to drink. Prophet Muhammad set out to go milk a sheep. Hasan came up to him, but Prophet Muhammad did not give him any of the milk. Fatima asked him if that was because he liked Hussein better, and Prophet Muhammad answered: “No, it is because he asked for it first.”

لَا يَرْحَمُ اللَّهُ مَنْ لَا يَرْحَمُ النَّاسَ

The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said to Aqra nomad chief who entered islam after fath e Makkah, “Allah will not be merciful to those who are not merciful to people.”

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 7376, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2319


Love another for Allahs sake

“لَا يُؤْمِنُ أَحَدُكُمْ حَتَّى يُحِبَّ لِأَخِيهِ مَا يُحِبُّ لِنَفْسِهِ”.

رَوَاهُ الْبُخَارِيُ

But how do we know it’s for His sake?

There are seven whom Allah will shade on a day when there is no shade but his. They are a just ruler, a youth who grew up in the worship of Allah, one whose heart is attached to the mosques, two who love each other, meet each other, and depart from each other for the sake of Allah, a man who is tempted by a beautiful woman of high status but he rejects her, saying , ‘I fear Allah,’ one spends in charity and conceals it such that his right hand does not know what his left hand has given, and one who remembered Allah in private and he wept.

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 629, Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi

وَرَجُلَانِ تَحَابَّا فِي اللَّهِ اجْتَمَعَا عَلَيْهِ وَتَفَرَّقَا عَلَيْهِ

This is why friends from umrah, al aqsa or Islamic study are so important.

Who do you know in this masjid for Allahs sake? 

Julaybib was an orphan, deformed, and extremely short. He was brutally rejected by society, because people at that time were more concerned with physical appearance and status than with integrity. Julaybib means “small grown” being the diminutive form of the word “Jalbab “.

His physical appearance and unknown lineage made people shun and spurn him. He was an outcast, which caused him much public humiliation and disgrace.

In a narration reported by Imam Ahmad, Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) went to a man of the Ansar and said, “Give me your daughter for marriage.” The man answered excitedly, “Yes, O Messenger of Allah, it would be an honor and a blessing.” Thereupon, the Prophet said, “I do not want her for myself.” The Ansari man asked, “Then for whom, O Messenger of Allah?”And the Prophet answered, “For Julaybib.” Having heard this, the man was shocked and then said, “O Messenger of Allah, let me consult her mother.” He went to the girl’s mother (his wife) and told her, “The Messenger of Allah is proposing marriage for your daughter.” In response, she joyfully said, “Yes, it would be a pleasure.” The Ansari explained to his wife that the Prophet was not proposing to marry their daughter for himself, but on behalf of Julaybib. His wife was almost shaken and immediately responded, “What! Julaybib? No, by Allah, we will not marry her to him.”

When the Ansari was about to leave to meet the Messenger of Allah to inform him about his wife’s disapproval, his daughter, a pious Muslim, asked her father, “Who is asking for my hand?” Her mother told her that the Prophet was asking her hand on behalf of Julaybib. Their daughter instantly asked them, “Are you refusing to follow the command of the Messenger of Allah? Follow his command, for I will not come to any harm.”

Hearing her daughter’s word, the mother remorsefully said, “Stop, my daughter! Don’t  say another word, for indeed I have erred, and I repent a thousand times over. As of this moment, there is no one who I would prefer for you than Julaybib.” The following day the marriage preparations were set in place. `Uthman ibn `Affan and `Ali ibn Abi Talib (may Allah be pleased with both of them) presented Julaybib a gift of money to help arrange the wedding reception, and to purchase necessary accommodation. So the Prophet married the beautiful daughter of the Ansari to Julaybib who was once rejected by the whole society. The attitude of the daughter of the Ansari was that of a true believer. The daughter’s attitude shows the confidence of a Muslim woman who could not be influenced by the whims of her society.

After one of the battles, the Prophet asked his Companions, “Is anyone missing amongst you?”They said, “So and so and so.” He asked them again,”Is there anyone missing amongst you?” And again they answered, “So and so and so.” The Prophet posed the question for the third time and their reply was “No.” Thereupon he said, “But I see that Julaybib is missing.” The Companions searched for him amongst those who had been killed and found him by the side of seven enemies whom he had killed before he martyred. The Prophet came there, stood by his body, and said, “He killed seven people. Then his opponents killed him. He belongs to me and I belong to him.” (Muslim)

Respect – see the value in everyone you meet

Respect means treating other people with courtesy and consideration. It also includes respecting their property, their privacy, and their views and beliefs. When you respect someone, you treat them with dignity and consideration. You also avoid doing anything that might hurt or offend them.

One of the best ways to show respect for someone is to listen to them carefully. This means giving them your full attention and not interrupting them when they are.

وَأَمَّا مَن جَآءَكَ يَسْعَىٰ ٨ وَهُوَ يَخْشَىٰ ٩

Aqsa trip – one simple man but he was far superior in his thinking about others – gifts for children at jumuah, purchasing books for a loca orphanage …

Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) said,

“There was a man from amongst the Bedouins of Bani Ghatfan whose name was Zahir bin Haram. He was unattractive and poor.

Whenever he came to Medinah for a need, he brought something for the Prophet (saw) as a gift, like fresh fruit, honey, cottage cheese or butter. Likewise, when the Prophet (saw) would prepare something to give to him whenever e wanted to leave, such as dates and so on.

The Prophet (saw) used to love him and say, “Zahir is our Bedouin and we are his city dwellers.”

Inna likulli haadhirathin baadiyah wa baadiyatu aali Muhammad Zaahir bin Haraam

Zahir was not very good looking. One say, Zahir (may Allah be pleased with him) left the desert and came to Allah’s Messenger (saw) but did not find him. He has some merchandise to sell so he went on to the market place.

When the Prophet (saw) found out about his arrival, he went to the market place looking for him. When he arrived, he saw him selling his merchandise with sweat pouring down from his face. He wore Bedouin clothers which did not smell good either. The Prophet (saw) hugged him tightly from behing, while Zahir was unaware and could not see who it was.

Zahir became scared and said, “Let me go! Who is this?!” But the Prophet (saw) remained silent. Zahir tried to release himself from his grip and started to look right and left. When he saw the Prophet (saw) he relaxed and calmed down, placing his back against the Prophet’s chest. The Prophet (saw) began to joke with him, saying to the public:“Who will buy this slave?! Who will buy this slave?”

Thereupon, Zahir looked at himself and thought of his extreme poverty, for he had neither wealth or good looks.

He said, “You will find me unmarketable, O’ Messenger of Allah.”

The Prophet (saw) said, “Do not say that. Indeed, you love Allah so will But you are not unmarketable with Allah. You are very precious to Allah.”


Courage is the ability to do something even though you are afraid. It includes standing up for what you believe in and not backing down even when the odds are against you.

Being brave does not mean that you are fearless. It means that you can face your fears and do what is right, even when you are afraid.

An example of courage or bravery would be if you saw someone being bullied and you stepped in to stop it, even though you were afraid of the bully. It would also include being the first person to stand up and speak out against injustice, even when everyone else is afraid to do so.


Self-control is the ability to control your emotions and impulses. It includes being able to resist temptation and making responsible choices.

When you have self-control, you are in control of your life and are not controlled by your emotions. You are also able to resist temptation and make choices that are in your best interest and of those around you.

Learning self-control prevents one from doing something as simple as overeating to more serious acts such as sexual assault. You will understand that “no” means “no” and follow suit.


Perseverance is the ability to keep going even when things are tough. It includes being persistent and never giving up. When you persevere, you don’t let obstacles get in your way.


Ā’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) reported: I asked the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him): “Have you ever experienced a day harder than the day of (the battle of) Uhud?” 

The 2 major cities of Arabia were home to the largest and most powerful tribes at the time.Quraysh and Banu-Thaqif. Ammar bin Hisham (Abu Jahl) and Abu Mas’oud at-thaqafi were the two most influential political leaders of their time. The idol, called al-laat, and its temple was also situated in Taif and the hope of the people of Taif was that this temple would receive the same attention as the Ka’bah for this reason. 

10 years of calling to Islam, the Prophet(SAW) Zaid ibn Haritha, the third of the believers who used to serve the Prophet(SAW) and was later adopted by the Prophet(SAW). Taif is about 70 miles from Makkah and they had no transport so they journeyed on foot through mountainous regions and the Prophet(SAW) is over the age of 50 having faced severe challenges in the loss of his beloved wife Khadeeja (Ra) and his uncle Abu Talib.

On arriving at Taif, he (SAW) set about arranged meetings with the leaders of Taif. For 10 days the Prophet spoke to one of their chiefs after another. None gave him a word of encouragement. The worst response came from three brothers, the sons of Abu Umair at-Thaqafi. These three brothers, Abd Yalil, Masud and Habib, were the recognized leaders of Taif. One of them was married to a Qurayshi woman and the Prophet hoped that this relationship would work in his favor. In the event the three men were extremely rude in their rejection of the Prophet’s approach. The first one said: “I would tear the robes of the Kaaba if it was true that God has chosen you as His Messenger.” The second said: “Has God found no one other than you to be His Messenger?” The third said: “By God, I will never speak to you. If it is true that you are God’s Messenger, you are too great for me to speak to you. If, on the other hand, you are lying, you are not worth answering.”

Fearing that the news of their rejection would serve to intensify the Quraysh’s hostility to Islam, the Prophet requested the Thaqif notables not to publicize his mission. They refused him even that and in fact some narrations explain that they offered rewards to the commoners to harm him(SAW). So crowds of their teenagers and servants chased and stoned him(SAW). The moment his feet were outside Taif, they lined up on and with every step thereon, they threw rocks at him with some narrations mentioning they would target his feet. His feet were soon bleeding and he was in a very sorry state. Zayd tried hard to defend him and protect him from the stones and Zayd was hit with large stones, one of which landed on his head and the Prophet(SAW) pushed him out of the way saying they are targeting me. As soon as their rocks finished, they picked up more, and they continued from the boundary of Taif to an area called Qarnul Manaazil – the distance between these points – 3 miles! At least an hour of constant torture, being pelted by stones and rocks continuously.

After their intense stoning, they finally stopped at Qarnul Manaazil near an orchard that belonged to two brothers from Makkah, 3 miles from Taif. Blood was pouring down his legs and arms and his feet were completely torn up. According to some narrations he collapsed and was carried by Zayd to a nearby spring to wash his wounds. His leather sandals had changed colour red and they had congealed so when he managed to get some respite, so Zayd struggled to literally peel them off his feet.

As the Prophet sat down, he said this highly emotional and touching prayer:

اللهم إليك أشكو ضعف قوتي وقلة حيلتي وهواني على الناس

“To You, my Lord, I complain of my weakness, lack of support and the humiliation I am made to receive

ياأرحم الراحمين أنت أرحم الراحمين.

أنت رب المستضعفين وأنت ربي

Most Compassionate and Merciful! You are the Lord of the weak, and you are my Lord

إلى من تكلني إلى عدو يتجهمني أم الى عدو ملكته امرى

To whom do You leave me? To a distant person who receives me with hostility? Or to an enemy You have given power over me?

إن لم يكن بك غضب علي فلا أبالي ولكن عافيتك هي أوسع ليأعوذ بنور وجهك الذي أضاءت له السموات و الأرض

I seek refuge in the light of Your face by which all darkness is dispelled and both this life and the life to come are put in their right course .

وأشرقت له الظلمات وصلح عليه أمر الدنيا والأخره

أن ينزل بي غضبك أو يحل علي سخطك

against incurring your wrath or being the subject of your anger

لك العتبى حتى ترضى ولاحول ولاقوة إلابك

To You I submit, until I earn Your pleasure. Everything is powerless without your support

At this point, the Prophet (S.A.W) said ‘I saw a cloud hovering above me, and lo and behold, I saw Jibreel (Angel Gabriel) came down from that cloud, and besides him was an angel that I had never seen before.’ And Jibreel said to the Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W), ‘O Muhammad (S.A.W), your Lord has seen how your people have responded to you, your Lord has seen what they have said to you, so he has sent me with the angel of the mountains to place at your disposal.’

The angel said, ‘O Muhammad (S.A.W), if you want, command me and I will cause the two mountains of Taif to collapse upon them.’ Taif is situated on a type of plateau between two mountains, and the angel asked the Prophet (S.A.W) if he should just squash the people between the same mountains whose pebbles they used to stone the Prophet (S.A.W) with.)

The Prophet (S.A.W), still bleeding and his shoes still wet with blood says, ‘No! Rather, I pray that Allah (S.W.T) blesses their children to be Muslims and worship Allah (S.W.T) alone. Even if they have rejected Islam, I pray that Allah (S.W.T) blesses their progeny to be Muslim.’ SubhanAllah!

Perseverance is the ability to keep going even when things are tough. It includes being persistent and never giving up. When you persevere, you don’t let obstacles get in your way.

Forgiveness is the ability to let go of anger and resentment. It includes being able to forgive yourself and others. When you forgive, you do not hold grudges.

It’s natural to feel anger and resentment when someone wrongs you but holding onto that negative emotion will only hurt you in the end. It’s important to learn to forgive so that you can move on with your life.


When you can wait calmly and not get angry, you are much more likely to have a good outcome. It includes being able to control your emotions and not fly off the handle at the first sign of anger or confrontation. When you are patient, you don’t act impulsively.


When you are kind, you show concern for others and act in a way that pleases or benefits them. It includes being gentle, caring, and helpful.


An open mind is the ability to see things from different perspectives and not be quick to judge. It includes being willing to listen to others, having empathy, and being willing to learn new things even if they are out of your comfort zone.

When you are open-minded, you don’t just listen to others, you actually hear them. You don’t make assumptions about what they are saying but instead, try to understand their point of view. Learning new things, even if they go against what you believe, helps an individual and society continue to move forward.


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